Jump to content


Our community blogs

  1. Fear of Failure

    Failure, something many fear. Weather it be in the weight room, at work, college, anything. This is what it has come to in 2018, you give something a try, fail and just say "I can't do it"? Is that supposed to be some excuse? You don't simply walk away from the challenges you are faced with in life, you plant your feet into the ground and keep moving forward. For example, we did Power Clean Max lift in weight room yesterday. One small skinny kid that had joined our group decided he wanted to just do 95 freakin' pounds for all the sets, let his low standards get the best of him. I said "Hell no", threw on more weight and told him to get his ass back up to the bar. More or less, he hit a new max weight. Not that it was much weight or anything, but he still did it. He was afraid of failing, so he took the easy way out. Meanwhile, me and my friend who were already 20 pounds into a new max lift, kept adding weight until we failed more than 3 times. I was reppin', seeing everyone almost snapping their wrists around me, it did not phase me at all. I was in a zone, a place where I simply don't give a damn. I was not phased when I sat in the face of failure, repping more weight than I ever had before. I was focused on the task at hand, and was ready for what I was facing. Hell, when I added more and more weight on that bar, I felt like I could do anything. 

    So, are you going to let life lay you flat on your ass, or will you get up and finish strong?



    Something many people can't do these days. Lock in, settle on their goals for the future. You see, people let the smallest distractions keep them from reaching their all time best in the classroom, weight room, or on the football field. Thinking about what others think of you, worrying about what is to come in the future, just focus for once. Keep the negatives out of your head, and grind. Trust me, it reflects on Friday nights when you go out on that football field and represent your town. Are you going to forget a call last moment, 5 yards away from the end zone? That's on you. Going to parties on the weekend, doing drugs and alcohol, when you should be studying? Is that truly how you want to live your life? Be a screw up now, and pay for it later? Excel on the football field, but can't get into a college because your GPA is total crap? Does not sound fun now, does it? 


    Lock in, focus up. Your future depends on it.

  2. It's been a long time and I haven't shared any new updates since a while. Sometimes, I feel it's just 2008 and we just started our community but when I see the calendar, it's 2018. When we started while back it was just me, Rainier, Joe, FEM, yoyo and medic. Rest others followed over the period of time. Medic was the one who pursued me big time, to add COD4 servers when COD4 was at peak. Then we become super popular in COD4 in top 5 and over the period of time, server activity declined. My this year goal is to make COD4 popular again slowly with new server settings and bring some oldies back for fun. I still can't believe Anique, you are still around. Even V!per came back from FAG days. 


    I still can't believe almost 10 years have passed by. 10 years is a long time. I was single, working, running community during free time and enjoying my free life.  It used to be really fun time and it still is. But let's be honest, oldies are like your first love in life. You never forget them no matter what. I just wish Rainier, Joe, Medic and others would get active again. I kinda miss them sometimes. I am glad yoyo is still around and kicking, irrespective to our personal differences while back. But hey it's all history and I look forward each day towards rising sun!


    I never for even once thought I will get to see 2018 with =F|A=. I had some rough time in my life during 2010-2013 and lot's of people helped me out. It would really hurt when I have to say, sorry guys, we are closing our community because of less donations, less peeps, less server activity. I get it, whatever comes in existence has to expire. But then every year, I say to myself, God no not this year, one year more. I would hate to see not talking to all of you. 


    We will be soon looking to promote some of our new members to help out oldies like me and fill in the shoes so that they can continue legacy of =F|A=. Does that mean, I am going inactive? No not at all. I will be around and kicking. In fact, I have started advertising about our website on COC, COR, COD4, ET, Insurgency and DOI forums to get more new players to our community. This community has given me so much, that I can't forget. 


    For once, I wish, I can go on lunch with all the members but alas, we humans are dreamers and that's what keep us alive. We are nothing but emotional animals, looking for some love from our friends and family. In this case =F|A= has been my first baby, friends and family!


    I for one, thank you to all of you for being so nice to me over all the years. From members to staff, I am lucky enough to find friends who came out for rescue when I needed the help most. 


    I will see you all tomorrow. Have a nice weekend ladies & gentleman!

  3. An international gaming clan... What's that? Instead of with friends, you play with virtual strangers with whom you can't communicate? No no no no no. Instead of friends you already have, you play with people you have not yet met. Those guys are flesh and blood just like you and when you wanna meet them, guess what? You can!


    In this blog entry I'll tell you the story of how this gaming clan made me meet with total strangers, delivered me a bright yellow "F|A Clan Co-Leader" T-shirt and made me invite a guy in my home who used to kill me several times a day on the server.


    First there's Hamburg. How do you set up a real life meeting? It's simple. You make a topic on the forums, make a poll about the meeting place and date, someone books a hotel and... You meet there.

    Or do you now? Our good friend Raziel was the one booking the hotel, you see. And this nice mister had disappeared from our good earth. So we ended up looking for a new hotel for Destiny and Guardian and I ended up at the strangest camping site I have ever encountered (there was no grass for the tents, but stones).


    Once we all found a place to sleep, Kowalski was ready to show us the city of Hamburg. We ate some weird fish burgers at the port, took some pictures for the rest of the clan and ate ice cream, bathing in the sun. It was all really fun. My only complaint was that DJ, Destiny, Kowalski nor Guardian were pretty girls but eh... You can't have everything! DJ bought us cookies and this is also where DJ told me I was promoted to co-leader! Quite strange hearing about clan stuff from a real life DJ :p. As if that ain't enough for the strangeness, I received a yellow "F|A Clan Co-Leader" T-shirt in my letterbox a few days later. How often do you get those from your other friends, huh?!


    At night we went for drinks. We took some extra beers to the port and stayed there talking until 4 am. What do gamers talk about? Yeah, sure. Games. Clan gossip. But also politics (it's allowed on those meetings!), life, girls,... The advantage about having no girls in the company is... You can talk about them.

    When Guardian and Destiny went home I stayed a little longer to visit the Schanzenviertel with Kowalski. It's a really cool "slum" (see picture). Last year I returned him the favor and showed him Ghent. I have a feeling we may meet again.




    Eh, I can't tell you everything in one blog entry so you'll have to hear about the other international encounter in the next part :D

    • 2
    • 6
    • 1407

    Recent Entries

    Latest Entry

    The following are places that I have visited around this wonderful world. The reviews are purely from personal experience. In no particular order:


    This country is beautiful inside and out. And not everyone is blond. There’s a working class side and there’s a swanky side.  You can easily find the up-town feel in Stockholm. People dress it, talk it, walk it. The architecture is amazing with the cobble stones and yellow buildings. There are some awesome museums there and the boat ride is a must in the summer otherwise prepare to freeze. There are charming hotels located everywhere and things are walking distance, but transportation is fairly easy to navigate. Many Swedes tend to keep to themselves and their social circles most of the time. I notice this a lot in airports-you know it’s the right gate when no one is talking, but everyone is staring. The younger generations are more “outgoing”. Tourists are very much welcome in most parts of this Scandinavian country. Knowing the language can help when visiting smaller towns (obvi). The food is delicious, fresh, and healthy. There’s this fast food chain Sibylla that I drool for though. IKEA is IKEA. There’s this thing called “fika”! It’s like a coffee hour, where you relax and chat over some pastries and coffee. Happens everyday. Prepare to get fat. I think they love the color white because most homes I’ve seen have white everything. My favorite outer design is the Falu Red style. Financially, you’ll want to save up a great deal if you plan on visiting here. Language wise, english is widely spoken so you are in luck. I have seen the northern lights when I was young. I want to visit northern Sweden sometime and attend a reindeer race.


    Crossing the Swedish/Norway border was fun. It all looks the same- green forests and beautiful people. Until you get to the coast. Fjords will blow your mind. A picture doesn’t suffice. I remember taking a car boat across a body of water. Never done that before. There are cute tourist friendly towns throughout parts of Norway. If you like seafood, this is a wonderful place to be. Financially, you’ll want to save up more than what you did for Sweden.


    Depending on how you plan your visit, you can really get in a lot of culture in less than a month. We all know the flight tickets are the expensive part. Once you get here everything is affordable. I’m not a pro on how to travel here as a tourist because I went as part of a group where I paid an amount for the trip and the itinerary was scheduled. There is an airline that flies you around Southeast Asia for very cheap though and I forget the name. The rural villages I saw were life changing. Riding elephants  near Chang Mai was amazing. The shopping here is fun and wallet friendly. You’ve most definitely heard about this country’s diverse selection of food. If not, you’re in for a piece of heaven when you visit. The people here are friendly and always smiling. Thailand isn’t called “the land of smiles” for nothing. Bangkok is quite the specimen. Aside from the smell, there is some beauty to see like the temples. You’ll find temples all over Thailand! Buddhism is very much prevalent here and like they say, it’s not a religion, it’s a lifestyle. I’ve heard Phuket is a place to visit. Never been. Also heard it’s fairly dirty. Can’t forget about the islands! There are many. The one I went to had resorts all along the beach as well as restaurants and bars. You’ll be sure to get whatever you need outta your system visiting Thailand.


    I may be a little biased, but California is the best state around. You’ll notice that it’s pretty diverse all around. All you need to do is follow the US 101 and you’ll see all the good stuff. Unless you want to see Yosemite and other inland places. San Diego has got a good vibe, LA has night life, and concerts. Santa Monica has an eventful pier. So does Santa Barbara which also has good shopping and farmers markets. San Luis Obispo has a cool college town. Obviously you have to see San Francisco, the city by the bay. Don’t forget to hit up the beaches as you visit. Venice, Carpinteria, and Santa Barbara are some good ones. Good food is found everywhere. Coastal towns will often have tasty seafood. Try the lam chowder in SF. I have yet to visit sea glass beach in northern Cali.

    New York is also a big state. I spent 2 days in New York City and that was not enough. There is a lot to see here. Went to an art museum and saw The Thinker and some of my man Van Gogh (Starry Night is at the other museum). Walked the Brooklyn Bridge. Went to the top floor of the Empire State Building. The transportation is good as long as you’re paying attention. It was freezing and windy when I was here, but the sun was out so it wasn’t all that bad. Gotta visit the Statue of Liberty and Ground Zero memorial next time I’m here. The other part of NY I’ve seen is upstate. The Niagara Falls are a must see. Beware, make sure you have your passport so you can visit the Canadian side, it’s prettier.

    I’ve spent some time in Seattle. Hip and busy city. There are some good outdoor things to do like a walk through a modern art gallery and shop the market. Don’t forget to visit the first Starbucks!

    Oregon has two halves, the dry farm country, and the hipster west coast. There’s more I promise, I haven’t seen it all. The country side, atleast where I was, there are a lot of hardworking, pro-gun, farmers, and Republicans. Portland has got a mix, and I’m pretty sure there’s a majority of tree-huggers, and Democrats. It rains a lot here like Seattle so prepare for that. I went on a few outdoor runs in Portland and the houses are beautiful. There’s also this really awesome ice cream shop that has the random-est flavors.  

    Can’t forget about Hawaii. Kauai is known as the Garden Island of the chain. It’s beautiful here. Again ABC stores are pretty pricey so save up folks. Jurassic Park was filmed here. Lots of beaches to snorkel and lounge at. Some are less touristy. The big island, Kona, has the volcanic parts and green parts. Take a helicopter ride around to see it all! Be sure to buy a good tourist book that will help you find your way around these islands.


    Well folks, I’ve been to a few other places (Australia, London, Germany, Poland) but I was too young to remember all of the details. One day I’ll add photos of my travels to my gallery. Hope you enjoyed this! Let me know what you think. Where have you been?


    • 1
    • 2
    • 403

    Recent Entries

    I've been thinking about something. I don't know how interesting this will be for people but I have a rhetorical question that I want to share: I wonder if the ingenuity of children is to do with their willingness to try new things? Children learn much faster than adults, it's well-known... Unless it's biological, this is my conclusion.


    I know I used to be fearless with technology. I would press all kinds of buttons and turn knobs. I didn't care. I don't take as many risks with that now... I bet you it's because I have mistakes logged in my brain that i remember, "Okay, you tried that once, so don't do it". Maybe that's our limitation as adults at times?


    I know a child asked me recently what was wrong with my eye. Just straight up. I was taken aback, but it was also refreshing so I explained it was Strabismus. There was no meandering or "pussy-footing" around and finding out later... She just asked the question and got an answer... Of course, mistakes are USEFUL; they advise against being foolish. Taking too many precautions, however, can be equally damaging.


    To put it plainly, apart from biology, I think children's ability to learn quickly has to do with their willingness to take risks; they don't have a pile of mistakes recorded to make them hesitate.

  4. Howdy folks! Been a few days, I know. My consistency has gone out the window and I apologize to those of you who take the time out of your lives to read my random babblings. So I'm currently engorging myself with a large pizza and cheesy bread, and a 2 litre of coca-cola. Not healthy I am aware, but due to my active history/lifestyle I require about 4000 Calories a day or else I become lightheaded and all around dont feel good. Ugh main problem with that is when i grocery shop for just myself it costs about 400$ per trip which is about once every 3-3.5 weeks. My favorite meal: Jambalaya with Andouille sausage. Also, kinda depends on the time of year... Xmas time and such i really like chicken and dumplings. Or some reallllllllly good from scratch chicken noodle soup/ beef stew. What are yalls favorite meals?? I wanna get to know yall as best as possible because who knows, we may end up running into eachother without even meaning to :)... would be one hell of a meet and greet lol. Hope yall are doin alright and keeping your spirits up. If ever yall need anything/ anyone to talk to just let me know and i promise to do whatever it is i can so as to help. Take care yall, until next time!

    • 1
    • 2
    • 940

    Recent Entries

    Pabbatt Blue
    Latest Entry

    Throughout my life I've never tried to fit in a group of people. I always thought the best people come to you and to never chase anyone. When I landed in this clan I joined for the Family core values I saw and respected, what this clan stood for. Love, respect, no bigotry, no hate, no racism, this was my perfect ideal world of people that could get along no matter there pasts, coinciding respect and etc. I met great people here and continue to this day learn different experiences from both older and younger members/trials/regulars of this clan. Now that is only the feeling of what I get this clan stood for with the Family motto. Feel free to laugh at me continuously but this is my past and this is why I joined. I never had a real functional family, this isn't meant to be the boy who cried wolf but just a touch upon my experiences. I know people have had it way worse, this is a way to get to know me like I'd like to know you guys/gals. At a young age I saw my mother abused, my father be a drunk and my grandfather go to prison for 20 years. Needless to say I didn't have any good role models except my mother. I got intoafist fight with my father multiple times where I knocked him out throughout my life. police came every time, the form they gave us to fill out for family dispute became so familiar after these fights I knew it by heart at the time. My father kept illegal guns and always stuck me into an awkward position of bailing him out of his troubles at a young age. This spiraled to me getting involved with gangs with other reasons in my life which I haven't really talked about here. Introducedto drugs at a young age that didn't help either. I was "Friends" with a gang in ri and ma both of which brought me and them serious trouble which I somehow always seemed to avoid. bailing them out from getting arrested, saving there ass, the guns, the fights, it always flashes back as regrets. But only a yearago before I joined this was my idea of a family. A life and and a elaborate past which I haven't explained even here in this blog to a good extent. I only wanted to touch upon it. So with this being said which isn't much just understand that I like everyone in this clan, I have horrible communication skills sometimes which a lot of you have seen more than others. But I always mean well to you guys. When I look at people in this clan I don't see Leaders, staff, trials, regulars, I see everyone as equal with equal things to offer in a difgferent category of the clan. I never mean to piss anyone off. I like all of you. And I enjoy seeing this clan grow. This is my escape I guess to say from my past. To anyone I've ever insulted by mistake, back lashed at, got into an argument with, just understand I'm sorry whether I was wrong or right. I like all of you and want to help in whatever way I can for all of you if you come to me. I'm proud to be a part of this community, scratch that, not community... FAmily. I never had a core understanding of a family.. So forgive me, I'm learning. And this is me asking for help.

    • 1
    • 3
    • 1605

    Recent Entries

    Latest Entry

    Just wanted to let everyone know my status. Foot is totally screwed. I've been in and out of the hospital because of infections in it. They can't seem to get it under control. Just when we think its gone away it comes back. But anyways haven't been able to play in a while I'm really sorry about that. Hope to be on this week.
    Thx Soup :D

    • 1
    • 5
    • 2036

    Recent Entries

    That's all. Need a new blog on here

    • 2
    • 9
    • 8615

    Recent Entries

    Pvt. Parts
    Latest Entry

    So, i dont know if anybody will read this but here i go. As i talked about in my previous blog, I used to be addicted to pain pills due to a long lasting injury that i got hooked on just from being on them for so long and eventually self medicating for my mood swings. But as of today, i am one year and one month clean and to me that is a HUGE milestone. Since i got clean, i took up working out to occupy my time and i have seen some tremendous gains. When i started working out I weighed a measly 138 pounds and standing 6 foot 1 inch tall. I put my whole self into working out and gained almost 30 pounds in three months which was great to me. It has changed my life for the better in ways i couldn't have even imagined and i cant see myself not exercising and taking health important. Not only have i grown physically but i also grown mentally that has made me a better person. As of right now i weigh 164 pounds and im trying to stay around there because i pole vault with 165 pound pole and i just feel good using that pole and if i gained more weight, moving me to a heavier pole, i feel i wouldnt do as well as i am right now (probably just a mental thing though). Another thing is before i started lifting was that girls never really paid much attention to me, i guess because of drugs and i was really skinny but now that i have some weight to me, they seem interested. Weird right? (lol) The strange thing is however, i feel like no woman is worth my time just because of my attitude towards life is drastically different than most people my age and they just wont work well with me. I have been talking to this girl for a while now that i feel has been worth my time and i can definitely see myself with this woman long term, but there is big problem with our situation. When we started talking, she just got out of a year long relationship a month before and she recently told me that she feels as if we jumped into things too quick, which we kinda did. Not only that but we are graduating next month and i will be going to a college thats about 3.5 hours away and she is staying home to attend a local college. We talked about everything and we decided its probably best to not start a relationship just to have it ruined by distance and not being able to see each other often. I said we could try to work it out but she just did not want to get in another relationship and have her feelings hurt in the end, which i completely understand but it just hurts so damn much. I felt like i found someone that can be there for me and support me through everything and vice verse but it just isnt working out how i would like it. I guess you can say that its depressing me a little and i've been in a funk since we decided that. As i mentioned before i am senior in high school and a graduation requirement is senior project which i have been finishing up in the past few months and it has been placing a huge amount of stress on me. Tomorrow however, I give my presentation on it, giving a 15 minute speech in front of panel of judges who basically decide my fate, which as you can imagine is placing a lot of stress on me but i will feel relieved after its all over. With all this stuff that is happening and things that are not going how i would like it really suck, I just gotta keep on moving forward. But hey, thats life.

  5. Junk food ruins your body. Although a little and in moderation will not hurt. The important foods to eat are seven raw almonds a day, blueberries if possible, an apple or two, a pear, grapes, salad (romaine and iceburg) with spinach leaves (oil and vinegar is best. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Stop eating food (if you can call it food) from McDonald's, and just get the coffee. MickeyD's coffee is really spurerb and a lot less expensive than Starbucks. The fancy coffees from Starbucks are not worth the energy. For cereals there are a number of them you can try. Personally Cheerios are a fav of mine. I don;t eat them every day, and usually I have some type of Steel Cut Oatmeal everyday. But the Quaker's 100% natural is a tasty cereal. Stay away from all sugary cereals. The sugary Cereals are the number one downfall. I gotta run. Do a web search. if you are overweight I do suggest taking some type of Probiotic, in the long run the cultures will eventually clean up a little, and will flatten your belly. If you are declared obese. Then seriously consider doing some exercise with doctor's consent. It is not too late to reduce your weight. I know obesity does not make you happy, but it was the sedentary lifestyle that did it too you. Start out by walking and maybe carrying some weights in your hand five to ten pounds. Going to a gym will greatly improve our self confidence and self esteem. When you make some effort to do weights or treadmill don;t overexert yourself. You didn't gain all the weight in one day you are not going to lose all the weight in one day. No more donuts either. sugar has calories. Stay away from all potato chips and pasta too. Consider the Atkins diet.
    The diet below is a different diet than above.


    Here;s a formula that helped me too lose 20 pounds. it's called the Zero Carbohydrate Diet. This also the high protein diet. By eliminating the carbs you allow yourself to burn old carbs which have to turned into fat. Because you have saved energy by eating only protein.


    Eat as much of the following things as you like. Trim all the Fat and pitch it. One of the inconveniences of this diet is you will more than likely become constipated. Start this diet after you have cleared out everything from the intestines) if you do get constipated then take some castor oil, or some laxative. Check with the physician. The Atkins diet is similar this diet is more extreme than Atkins. If you already have a heart condition then don;t do this diet, If you have a thryoid problem then ask the physician. Your cholesterol will likely go up. The first time I did this diet I did no exercise. The second time i did this diet I did excercise and I really lost weight off. Try without the exercise first.
    What I used to do was get cold cuts from the Deli and eat those for snacks, eat as much of the following as you like.


    Brick Cheeses (check labels, might say two carbs move to the next cheese till the littlest amount possible 0 or maybe one then it is fine)
    Cottage Cheese (same as above get the cottage cheese with few carbs possible) you need some variety
    Farmers Cheese (not sure about this one)
    Cornish Game Hen
    Diet Drinks as long as they have zero carb sweetners
    Coffee (personally I used no cream) stick with water
    Water (of course)


    you can eat as much of the above as you like




    Pork, Shrimp, or Lobster) (Shrimp and Lobster have too much cholesterol). Pork will ruin this diet. I'm not sure why, It has something to do with the higher fat content
    No Alcohol of Any Kind (i know this blows but it really pays off in the end).
    No Baloney
    No Cold Cut Loafs
    No anything that has any excess fats or carbs
    No Hot Dogs
    No Sausage
    No Bratwurst
    No Kielbasa
    No Salad Dressing
    No Fruits
    No Vegetables
    No Lettuce of any kind.
    No PopCorn
    No Candy
    No Bread
    No Ice Cream
    No Soda Pop
    No Kool Aid
    No Fruit Juices
    No Energy Drinks
    No Beans
    No Crackers
    No Potato Chips
    No Pizza
    No Cookies
    No Fried Foods
    No Pasta
    No Bread
    NO IPA
    NO ALE
    No Carbohydrates




    go very easy on butters and oil
    go very easy on condiments , cream and sugar easy too
    Do a search on web for ages for this diet. (high protien diet , zero carb diet)
    send me email at <script data-cfhash='f9e31' type="text/javascript">/* */</script> if I can be of any assistance


    All The Best,
    your friend
    Chet :D


    Prime did edit here

  6. when I sleep I get sometimes difficult from my
    sleep do not know how it comes.
    when I dream I often dream about the environment
    where I am, I'll do as I'm awake.
    but is not that the felon is when I try to get awake
    always come back to the same place.


    will be strange to come to share this but once it
    I'm awake. I feel very strange at. :unsure: >>> google translate

    • 1
    • 21
    • 7175

    Recent Entries

    2015 for me, was probably the craziest year I have had in the 42 years I have been on this planet. As some may or may not have noticed, I was absent most of last year. This was due to a massive heart attack and the subsequent quadruple bypass surgery. Well I was fortunate enough to beat that monster and survive with quite a long recovery. I'm not sure of the time table, but sometime during recovery I am diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure. For those of you who don't know what that really means here is a link to kind of describe http://www.webmd.com/heart-disease/guide-heart-failure


    So with all the Dr. appointments, and more than anything, my failing health, I spent far less time on the forums and servers last year. I took almost all of last year to get a grip on my situation, even moving back closer to my family, realizing your mortality has a way of bringing you home. It took me a while to come to grips with everything and more than likely don't have enough of a grip as I should.


    I tried to focus more on friends and family than I had, spending more time in real life than with gaming, plus staying well long enough to get through COD match was an issue. Sitting behind my desk required more energy than I had at the time. It wasn't that I didn't want to be here with everyone, I just didn't have the strength to do so.


    A couple months ago I started some new meds, a new diet and also found out that the reason I was unable to control my diabetes was because I was insulin resistant. I didn't even think such a thing was possible. My body wasn't absorbing the insulin I was taking, so my Endocrinologist put me on a new med that helps my body absorb the insulin and finally I am seeing good numbers.


    With these new meds for my diabetes, neuropathy and CHF (Also diet and exercise) I started to feel better, and become more active. Things have been better the past couple of months, I have gotten some gaming under my belt and been on the forums again. I have tried a few times in the recent past, but was unable to maintain because of my health, but I hope things are different this time.


    I have missed everyone here greatly, and missed all the fun on the servers and I hope for now I am able to continue to be a part of this awesome community for as long as possible. I have made some incredible friends here and I hope to make more.


    Hopefully 2016 will be a much better year, so far so good :D

    • 2
    • 1
    • 6211

    Recent Entries

    An Assassin's Joy




    It's the crimson serenade of screams,

    neighbors woken from sweet dreams,
    the pouring life from open veins,
    the deathly screams of lethal pains,


    It's the cry for mercy in the night,

    that keeps an assassin's heart alight,
    the unwritten rules that have been laid,
    like live by the sword die by the blade,


    It's the thrill of the chase,

    how their victim's hearts race,
    the success of the kill,
    on a night deadly still,


    an assassin's joy comes from your pain,

    for you are a toy until you are slain,
    It's a twisted pleasure for a twisted mind,
    an assassins joy is far from kind





  7. Ok so it's a great time to be a CS fan. Prolly the biggest tournament of the year is here. ESL One cologne starts today! If you never watched it before, then you should definitly watch now. Not just as a player to learn, but even if you dont care much about cs you should watch. Just to hear the crowds go wild when a sick play happened is awesome.


    For those interested here is the schedule, standings and the livestreams in the language you prefer.


    Its gunna be a fun 4 days :)

  8. blog-0381839001430480297.jpg

    My pray here. :)


    Some know i moved to Australia from Estonia and nowdays i live here. Before that i had couple of challenges to stay here for longer.

    So i had to make my second year visa to revive my another year to stay in Australia. do get it i had to make reginal work for that.( 88 days= 3 month)

    I took my bag and living and head to small town called Hyden Western Australia. 370km from Perth City. small country town.



    Where i was working acctually 5 month and wasn't so bad where i heard before. In time where i worked we went in the pub after work, friends had couple beers there.

    I knew Couple local there and got new friends. Afther friend finishing beers we head back home to rest and be fresh for another workday.

    On the way when i was driving home i saw girl who i knew. she where look very drunk and not felt good. ( i was clear cause i was driving.) Did not drink any drinks what contains alchol.


    So i turn around and head to her to ask those she need lift home or help. After i made turn there was car on wrong way trafic. wow i was suprised was thinking what is happening....??? He was driveing foward and i had revers. After i stop and one guy came out the car and sayd " Leave her alone " meh I asked "what i did?"

    He sayd:"her boyfriend had car crash few moth ago and he died."


    I where wondering,

    I did not know about this because she did not told me about it. She seemed to me happie and nothing suspicious.

    My friend asked about the blocking the road and keep driving foward our way. My friend where very angry but i was relaxe and keept calm.


    When i turn around my head to say my friends to shut up and calm down i got punch in my face. Straight away my friend came in the fight and gave him few hit back. I step few step back where thinked what is happening GOD!


    Afther everyone calm down we went home and talk about it on balcony front of the house where we temporarily was living.

    Everyone was suprised what happening in this night. My friend where nice people and where not agressive personality.


    It wasn't end of this night. One car came to our house. I was like "comon what now" they where first guy friends.

    Two adult came out about 40 year old and where saying many bad things. Sayd "we need to leave from town we are not welcome there".

    After talking with them around 30min they start being nice.


    We finish around 11:00 Pm and in the end all was happie.


    Fairy next day i spoke with girl and her friends and asked who is this guy and what he wanted.

    Girl sayd:" This guy is This town bad boy and doing bad things such as weed, drink doing alot different drugs ect.

    Same is with hes friends


    In the end i head back after couple of month to Perth city and still here:)


    Karma will come after hiim one day :) And be careful if you are around country side town they are sometime dangerous. :/


    There is one cool rock too.

  9. As most of you may know, I recently had another heart attack, and as a result ended up going through a quadruple bypass surgery. It was crazy but I survived. So I figured I would post this blog to give a bit more detailed idea of how it all went down..


    I Had been having some chest pains through basically all of march, but that was nothing unusual considering I had had a couple of heart attacks in 2011, and even some stents. The reason I didn't worry as much was, as soon as a rested for a moment the pain would go away, and all went back to normal again.


    Well early on the 3rd of April we were having a downpour here where I live, and the water was up really high. Normally I wouldn't think much of it, but considering all the flooding we had been having I was keeping an eye on it. As the water rose I decided I would walk out to the creek and have a look, so my lady and I put our shoes on and headed out. By the time we got to the water, which was well less than 1/4 mile from my house, I was out of breath and having bad chest pains. Again I caught my breath, and everything seemed to be okay. We decided we would come back to the house, jump into the suv and go for a drive, and check out how high the water was in other places. Once we walked back to the car, I had to run in the house to get the keys. My chest was hurting again, so I sat down to catch my breath, but this time the pain did not leave, and I couldn't catch my breath, which made me more than nervous.


    I walked back out with the keys and told Teresa that I thought we should goto the ER and have this checked out. I still didn't think it was anything serious, but I can't lie, it was worrying me.


    We get to the ER, and because of my history they brought me straight back. After an EKG, and the usual things you do to check for heart issues, my Cardiologist who happen to be there recommended a heart cath. For those of you who do not know what that is, They put you on this table, give you some goofy drugs and then run a wire through your arteries and look for blockages, the goal being to find them, place a stent and keep the blood flowing through my body.


    Well turns out the heart catch did more than find a simple blockage, it found 3 100% closed off and 1 that was 99% so they realized indeed I was having a heart attack, and a massive one at that.


    The doc informed me of what he found, and informed me that I had to undergo surgery. By the time we had gotten to this point, it was Saturday the 4th, and the surgeon that should have been there had taken a vacation, so we had to wait for another to arrive. They scheduled my surgery for 9am Sunday morning, which can give you way to much time to think about having your chest cracked open, fortunately because of the pain, the kept me doped up on morphine and painkillers.


    Sunday morning rolled around, they put me under and went to work. It only lasted around 5 hours, and then I was out and straight into recovery, which was pretty sucky because, if your oxygen levels aren't right, even though you may be breathing on your own, the keep the tubes ran down your throat. Now it was bad enough that they had all sorts of tubes stuck in my chest, and a pump in my leg to keep blood flowing, but now I was awake with a giant tube in my throat, which prevented me from talking, or drinking anything at all, not to mention that I constantly felt like I was suffocating. I understood that I was breathing, but the machine was doing it for me, and let me tell you, nothing can ever feel more suffocating.


    Later that evening they started taking all the tubes out of my chest, and out of my throat, which was awesome no matter how bad it hurt when they did it, and man did it hurt.


    I stayed in the hospital a few more days and they were amazed at how fast I was recovering, so they decided I could come home, which I was far far beyond excited hehe. I have been home for a week or so, not sure on the timeline as I have been on painkillers this whole time, all I know is I am home, and alive, both of which almost never happened. The Doc said I was very ill when I came in, and told me it was more than a miracle that I was alive, and that is awesome and the scariest thing at the same time.


    I am doing pretty good atm, I stay tired and am unbelievably sore which is to be expected, I mean, they did saw through my chest bone, crack it open and work on me hehe..


    Anyway, I am alive and getting better, and maybe soon can rejoin FA on a regular basis, heck, I even got some COD in today, and man did it feel good..


    I am posting these pics just because I think you can see where I was to what I became.. I am so thankful to be alive, and so thankful to have all of you my friends here..


    This pic is right before I went in for the heart catch, and I think you can tell, I didn't seem all to worried hehe



    This pic is after I had all my tubes removed after the surgery, I think you can see here what a toll it took on me, not to mention the awesome scar haha.



    With all that being said, I am thankful for being alive, for all my friends and family, and I truly do love everyone of you!

  10. Update 25 March 2015: Added links to download Microsoft .NET Framework 4.5.1 which is required to run ETManager. Furthermore, I am not sure if it is a bug with my Windows 10 Professional Technical Preview Virtual Machine but ETManager Alpha does not seem to be able to launch after installation even with Microsoft .NET Framework 4.5.1 installed. Though in my main computer running Windows 7 Professional, ETManager runs fine. If anyone is experiencing issues running ETManager Alpha even with Microsoft .NET Framework 4.5.1 installed, please do not be afraid to contact me via the comments section or through private message. I will look into the issue and try my best to resolve it. Thank you. Sorry for any inconvenience caused.


    Before reading the entry below, if you don't know what ETManager is please refer to this entry: Test Development. It is also important to note that this is not an advertisement. I did not publish this entry to show off or anything else. I am sharing my work with you all so that we can all enjoy Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory together. You can think of it as my contribution to Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory and Fearless Assassins for their fun ET Servers. Thank you.


    I know it has been more than a week since I posted my last entry with regards to ETManager, that was because over the past few days I have been spending countless hours trying to get ETManager Version Alpha ready and usable for the general public. It took longer than I expected as each time when I was about to release it, during testing, I would discover new bugs and have to quickly fix it. There were some bugs that were really difficult for me to fix which is possibly due to my inexperience. Fortunately, after thinking through many different methods and trying many different alternatives, I am happy to say I have finally finish ETManager Version Alpha. Though it currently only has basic features and may be incomparable to ET Starter Pro at the moment, however, I will try my best to regularly update ETManager and put in all the ideas which I have for ETManager into a finished product. (You can refer to the Test Development Entry for a sneak peak of ETManager and some of the ideas which I plan to implement.)


    Features in ETManager Version Alpha:


    For players who are planning to play ET you can...

    Download Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory directly from ETManager and install it (PunkBuster and ETKey Generator are included).


    For players who already have ET installed you can...

    Run PunkBuster Tool and ETKey Generator to check if you have PunkBuster and ETKey installed and install it if you don't have them.

    Connect to your favourite ET Servers directly from ETManager.

    View the status of your favourite ET Servers courtesy of et.trackbase.net

    Automatically patch your ET Version to either 2.55, 2.56, 2.60, 2.60b.

    Delete existing etkey and auto request and generate new etkey.

    Start ET Minimiser.

    Currently, the default local server list has 3 Fearless Assassin Servers. I just picked 3 Fearless Assassin Servers randomly for testing purposes. You can edit it if you want.


    ETManager related:

    Auto check for updates for ETManager.


    Known issues in ETManager Version Alpha:


    ETManager's auto updater does not auto install updates for ETManager and instead points to my development website which has not been updated for a long time and does not have any download links for ETManager. (However, it will still notify you if a new version of ETManager is available.)


    Initial ET Configuration Page is not coded yet. (You can just click the Next button to skip it.)


    Errors are not displayed properly yet and there is no error reporting system as of now. (You can just comment below or private message me if you encounter any errors and I will try my best to fix it.)


    Database System and Repository System are not working yet. Please use "Local" in the meantime.


    Planned Features:


    I will post this when I have the time as it is a long list. Sorry for any inconvenience caused.



    Those are the features and known issues I can think of as of now, I may have missed some and I am sorry if I did.


    With regards to documentation, I will create an ETManager documentation when I have the time. I plan to finish coding more features first especially the repository system before creating the documentation since the repository system requires some explaining to server administrators on how it actually works and how to set it up.


    As for my development website, though my forum profile and in ETManager both stated my website link, it is important to note that my website has not been updated for a long time due to most of my free time being spend on ETManager. I will update it when I have the time.


    Note: The reason why ETManager is currently limited in features is because it is still in Alpha. I placed top priority in ensuring that the basic features are fully coded and fixed. I apologise for the lack of features. I will regularly update ETManager during my free time.


    Download Links (I will add more download links if needed, you can just request for it either through the comment section or through private message):


    ETManager Version Alpha: Mega

    Supports: Windows

    Tested on: Windows 7 Professional

    MD5 Hash (Installer): 2E62EB35B8A3EFDD79CA30C02947E18A

    SHA-1 Hash (Installer): 783940B7EC78A5EC1423A1BB1AEC2431CE47D00D

    SHA256 Hash (Installer): D5668DE0348675DEC5482057D307FB8A16286DA690B51FFEA08C6499D5AB96EF

    VirusTotal Results (Installer): Scan Report


    Required Files:


    Microsoft .NET Framework 4.5.1 Official Download: Web Installer Offline Installer


    You might have noticed that VirusTotal scan showed that as of 22 March 2015, the detection ratio is 1/57. Only Zillya detect it as Tool.InjDll.Win32.142. I am not sure why this occur but as you can see from the rest of the scan report by 56 other antivirus softwares, ETManager is clean of virus. The only reason why I can think of it detecting ETManager is likely due to ETManager being a new tool and only a few users used it so they do not have much data on ETManager.


    If you want to compare hashes, you can download a free program call HashTab by Implbits. Install it and then right click on ETManager Installer and under Properties, click "File Hashes" and you can check and compare the installer's hashes with the one I have posted above. If they match means you have downloaded the correct ETManager Installer. If it doesn't, it is most likely not my tool.


    You can download HashTab by Implbits here: Download HashTab


    Note: The hashes might change in the future with new builds of ETManager's Installer following new updates of ETManager. I will try to update the download links, hashes and VirusTotal Results as much as I can depending on my free time. Thank you.


    Release Notes:


    Version Alpha (22 March 2015)

    Initial Release


    I apologise for not being able to provide any direct links as I do not actually own an actual website. My current development website is not updated and uses wordpress.com which is a free wordpress hosting website. As for why I did not use free webhosting, it is because they are susceptible to attacks, viruses, etc, in order not to let my users download infected files, I did not use them and instead uses trusted file hosting websites as of now. When I have enough money, I may purchase a webhosting. Sorry for any inconvenience caused.


    Installation Instructions:


    1) Download ETManager Installer Version Alpha.exe from the download links above.

    2) Launch ETManager Installer Version Alpha.exe

    3) Follow the install process.

    4) You have successfully installed ETManager.

    5) Please remember to right click on ETManager's desktop shortcut and go to Compatibility. Under Privilege Level, make sure the "Run this program as an administrator" checkbox is checked. This can help avoid some errors which you might experience.


    Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ):


    Question: Why am I not able to patch my ET or connect to an ET server?


    Answer: This may be because you did not run ETManager as an administrator hence, ETManager may not have the administrative privileges or rights to patch your ET or run ET.exe. Please also ensure you entered the correct ET.exe Path and ET Directory Path. You can change this by going to the Main page of ETManager and then at the top left hand corner click "Menu" then "Options" followed by "General". Remember to click the save button after you finish making your changes. If it is a new ETManager Installation it is possible that for some reasons the Initial ETManager checks were not performed, please reset ETManager by clicking Menu which is located on the top left hand corner of ETManager's Main Page then click "Developers" followed by "Reset ETManager". Click yes when asked if you want to reset ETManager and the application will reset and restart. You should see the initial ETManager checks being performed for your new ETManager Installation.


    Question: ETManager suddenly disappeared even though I installed it?


    Answer: It may be because your antivirus has removed it by mistake. I can assure you that I have no malicious intent and have not included or code any files that might harm your computer in the form of a virus though I do not provide any warranty for the use of ETManager. I personally use Norton Internet Security, it did not detect ETManager as a virus though there was once while I was testing it did remove ETManager due to it being high risk caused by the lack of data on ETManager since it is a new tool and only a few users used it. Please whitelist ETManager if you face this problem and the issue should be resolved. You can view VirusTotal Report on ETManager Version Alpha here: Scan Report.


    Question: Why does my ETManager shows unregistered version. Does that mean I have to pay for it?


    Answer: No, you don't have to pay for it. ETManager is a free program created by me. The registration feature is so that in the future it will be easier for me to allow certain users such as beta testers to test ETManager by giving them access to beta features not yet ready for the public. Anyone can sign up as a beta tester though it takes time for me to review the requests and send out product keys for beta testers to activate. As you might have notice, the registration feature is not finished yet. The details on How to Register will be released in the future. Currently, I am working on other features which I have planned, if you have any questions regarding it you can leave a comment in the comment section or send me a private message.




    I will post more images when I have the time. In the meantime, you can refer to my previous entry: Test Development for images. Sorry for any inconvenience caused.



    You might see empty spaces or boxes and default icons in ETManager, this is because I do not have time and do not have the expertise to design icons and banners which is where the empty spaces or boxes are suppose to be. It would be great if someone can help me design icons and banners, you can even design them for Fearless Assassins, for example Fearless Assassins banners for the main page of ETManager. I am open to it as well since I think Fearless Assassin Servers are fun though it would be great if it is just a general banner and icon for ETManager. :) Credits will be properly given on the credits page of ETManager and on the Full Credits List. You can choose to contribute if you want, it is optional.


    If you do contribute regardless of how small the contribution is or what the contribution is (eg. designing, reporting bugs, suggesting features, or just saying Thank you or words of encouragement), I would like to express my gratitude to you. Thank you, it means a lot and helps increase my motivation. :D


    You can go to ETManager's Credits Page under Menu > Help > About > Credits to view the Credits. If I have missed anyone in the Credits List I apologise. Please notify me under the comments section or private message me.


    For updates on ETManager, you can follow me on Twitter: @blackknight8653 or click the follow button at the top right hand corner of this entry to follow this entry. I may choose to update this entry with newer version of ETManager or create a new entry. Thank you. ;)


    Last but not least, I hope you enjoy ETManager. Thank you for your support. Appreciate it. ^_^ I am finally able to take a short break and play Wolfenstein: Enemy Territory on Fearless Assassins Silent Servers and Jaymod Servers after not playing for many days due to most of my free time being spent on developing ETManager Version Alpha. Hope to see you all on Fearless Assassins Servers. Please do not be afraid to say Hello to me if you see me. :)

    • 1
    • 34
    • 6095

    Recent Entries


    Tonight I had to say goodbye to a loyal friend and guardian to my family. Hero passed away @ 11:55 pm on Tuesday, March Third in my arms.

    Those we love don't go away,

    They walk beside us every day.


    RIP You Gentle Giant, Enjoy that big, open field buddy

    • 1
    • 1
    • 4317

    Recent Entries

    Latest Entry

    Hey guys, I'll be going to California for 3 weeks due to Army Reserve training. I'll be leaving this Feb. 21st and won't be back till the 13th of March. Didn't know where to put this and I just wanted to let any admin or anybody know that'll I'll be away during this time period.

    • 1
    • 1
    • 4155

    Recent Entries


    I believe the keystone of a strong foundation of a meaningful, effective and everlasting democracy is the “freedom of expression.” Without freedom of expression, any form of a democracy is a sham. The despotic rulers and leaders of today, whether political or religious, seem to believe that the key to conquering the minds of any people is to create a threat of terror such as what the world just witnessed in Paris. Sadly, this appears to be working in some corners of the world, but we in the free world cannot and should not succumb to any such threat by suppressing our own freedoms at home or shrugging our shoulders as though it was just another random mass shooting.

    I believe the brutal assault against freedom of expression on French soil was a direct attack on the foundation of America. This is why I am disappointed that neither our president nor the secretary of state showed up in Paris with other free world leaders to show America’s support for freedom of expression and to personally present our nation’s condolences to the French people. I am concerned our unexcused absence created the appearance of American weakness and/or ambivalence, which can only empower and embolden the enemies against freedom of expression, who are all enemies of America.

    Freedom of expression, as both an ideal and the law in America, is manifest in American independence, individualism, diversity, creativity, innovation, knowledge and tolerance. This has fostered the development of a dynamic economy based on innovation, created a solid educational system that provides opportunity for all, and formed the foundation of a lasting democracy in which everyone is free to worship the deity of their choice — or none at all.

    While I may be annoyed with the shameless ways some express themselves on cable news, in the editorial pages, over the internet, through satellite radio or even on a magazine cover, I view that as a very small price to pay for the freedom we all have to express our personal ideas, beliefs and opinions about most everything in life. Also, if I don’t like what I hear, read or see, I have the cherished freedom to change the channel, turn the page, get off YouTube or not buy the magazine. (I also believe in karma.)

    Throughout world history, many societies, cultures and governments imprisoned the minds of the populace in order to protect and enhance undeserved and unfair political, religious and/or economic power. Peoples from many walks of life were brutally punished, if not executed, for simply expressing themselves in a way that questioned the status quo set at the time by some despotic ruler or political or religious order. To get a firsthand view of the history of the brutal assault on freedom of expression, one should visit the Instruments of Torture exhibit in San Diego’s Balboa Park. The complete silence at the exhibition speaks loudly of the ghostly screams one will hear in his/her mind from those who were tortured and died for daring to express their minds on things that many don’t give a second thought to placing on any of the social networks on the Internet for all the world to see. At the end of the exhibit, one will learn that in some countries, societies and cultures today one could still be put in prison for years or be subject to a summary death penalty for some of the thoughts shared with your friends on Facebook.
    • 1
    • 2
    • 3829

    Recent Entries

    Hi guys,


    Some of you may have noticed that I've been MIA for about a month or so, if not a little longer. I started having problems with my muscles about six months ago. Right calf had severe pains.. I thought it was a blood clot. Had hallucinations (was seeing cats that weren't there, gold dots floating around, things moving.), memory loss, and other random stuff.. But clot tests and a MRI came back fine.. Didn't think much of it, because the doctors I went to said I was fine.


    One even told me I was on bath salts. Was the only explanation in her eyes. Of course, I don't do drugs, especially not bath salts.. Have heard of enough soldiers murdering people on the local base here while using those. So, I figured maybe I was just getting lazy or something. Or I wasn't exercising enough, even though I walked four miles every day. One doctor said it was due to a lack of stretching and my achilles tendons were too tight.. Said if I tried to play rugby, I would not be a happy camper. Was possible.


    I got back into guitar a couple months ago, and was running drills pretty hard to catch up on it, since I haven't played it in a year or so. Was playing piano stilll though, so it wasn't like I was completely out.. Did all the proper stretches for it, got rest when I was tired, usually. After about a month, my four fingers on my left arm completely stopped working. Thumb was fine.. And for a couple weeks, I couldn't figure out the cause. I figured I just shredded my extensor digitorum. Was similar to what happened to my leg.


    During that time my left thigh muscle started failing me horribly. Was still usable, but with extreme pain and weakness. Prayed about it and decided to do my own research and found that magnesium serum tests that they use here are useless.. Since it checks the blood level, but it's mostly stored in cells and bones, not blood. Increased my dietary magnesium (read: Ate a LOT of unsalted cashews and high magnesium mineral water.) and things started improving, slowly.


    Was able to use my fingers again about a week and a half ago, but was still very sore. Same with the leg. Ordered some supplements for magnesium glycinate last week and a ton of things have been improving drastically.. Can feel, even see, my pulse in my wrists, I don't overheat easily anymore. Even lost nearly 20 pounds in a week. Guess I had a pretty severe deficiency. Am still randomly tired some of the time and get the occasional massive headache. But is said that it can take up to six months for a full recovery.


    Once my hands were somewhat useable again, about a week and a half ago, I started a project for a song. Will be my first one for sale. Am hoping it will be ready by the 12th. Am doing my best, God willing, but will see what He has in mind. Am also trying to ease my way back into ET now. I've played a bit over the past couple days. So, progress is happening. ^_^


    Hope to see ya guys in game soon. :)

  11. As some of you know, today is my birthday! I am now officially 19! This year has been amazing, one of the best actually, and I want to share with you guys all the stuff I had gone through and all of my friends in the F|Amily who had helped me go through the way!


    So one if the biggest events was the day I had graduated high school! It was amazing, I was with all my friends, we were laughing! Man I miss that day so much :D. Here's a picture!



    Get it, cuz its a hot "dog" :D


    Anyways, the second biggest thing that had happened was me entering my university of choice. I didn't want to go to any big place like Harvard, McMasters or Queens. I had decided to go to York University to continue learning about psychology! A lot of my friends had gone to different places but I'm still in touch with those nublettes!


    One of the happiest moments was this. I had a crush since I was grade 9, she was so cute and nice, smart, she seemed perfect. I didn't have the guts to ask her out until the high school graduation. She said yes, I was so relieved! IT had finally gotten off my chest, and I feel so happy!


    And last but certainly not the least, was joining the F|Amily. Man, I'm so glad you guys accepted me as a trial, my life here had been amazing. I met so many good people, I don't want to leave, I want to become a full member as fast as I can!


    Some honorable mentions of the F|Amily who had been especially nice to me and helped me continue were


    Reverze (for sure): He was the very first friend who was part of the family. He was extremely nice, helped me make my application and answered all of my questions. You the man, but you're still a noob :D


    Sponkala: Another person who had helped me with my application! Shout out to you, you're almost as big of a noob as reverze! <3


    ThunderCat: Although we dont talk too much, I think you and me are pretty good friends. Considering you were one of the first people to talk to me on the forums, I have to shout you out! Keep on being awesome!


    Chameleon: How can I forget you, nublette! ̿,̿,/̵͇̿̿/ε=(◕‾◕)=з\̵͇̿̿\,̿ ,̿ ┻━┻ R.I.P. !! You're extremely nice to me, and always made me laugh. Thanks alot and keep it up!


    The Be Brothers (Be Paranormal and Be Activity): You guys are awesome! Me and paranormal have been friends for a while, we talk and he seems like a cool guy! Activity is a good friend to me also. On my first blog he had told me some stuff about him, and made me feel a connection. Thanks Paranormal and Activity!


    Von Rantala: Too nice :D. Also one of the few friends I had made when I had entered the forums. Thanks for all the help!


    The Silent Crew (Meow, Mule, Gengis, My ass, etc...): You guys are still noobs btw. You guys have me a warm welcome when I decided to leave jay mod alone. You guys rule!


    Unknown/Teacher: For helping me with my application, thanks!


    The Leaders and Admins: I want to thank you guys the most for allowing me to be inside F|A, you guys rule and I don't want to leave you guys!


    Panther: For being a nub. You're nice and awesome, keep it up and thanks for the support!


    DJ: Thanks for posting up the Pics of the DAy and MoTD, they always made me laugh and made my day better!


    Sid and Ol' Smoke: I dont know you guys that well but you guys always make me laugh! Keep it up :D


    That's all for now. Thank you guys for the support. Being 19 makes me feel really special and so does being with the F|Amily. Frag on and see you guys later!

    • 1
    • 3
    • 3265

    Recent Entries

    My first and probably last blog. I’m writing this with all the wars and problems of the world in mind, like Gaza, like Ukraine and many more. Conflicts in different places, nearby or far away. Terrorism in your own country and countries anywhere. I think, problems are everywhere. But did you ever think about how they occurred? Or better, how to stop them? Maybe you did, like me. I’m a thinker, and now, I’m at a point of sharing my own thoughts.

    In my opinion we all need to live in freedom! It’s easy to say, I know, but am I right or wrong? We should have freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom of everything. But we all say; “I live in the free western part of the world”. But how ‘Free’ are we?

    Freedom of speech

    With the latest terrorist attacks of Paris in mind, freedom of speech got a new dimension. Is making a cartoon of someone’s religion freedom of speech or just an incitement of hatred? But, we could also see it from the other side. Is judging a cartoon as racism or hate speech good or just stupidity?

    Why should a cartoon hurt someone? Why should you kill people who made ‘just’ a cartoon? I know it’s a cartoon about a religion, but why? Why should you kill someone for making a cartoon? Are you better than the cartoonist by killing him?

    I think, feeling hurt by someone’s opinion is a choice. You choose to feel hurt, or just leave it behind and go on with your life. Freedom of speech is important to know how someone else is feeling, but we need to learn to accept someone’s opinion and try to respect each other.


    Freedom of religion

    A lot of people nowadays are saying that the Islam is a bad religion. But is it bad? There is a Islamite State(IS) who kill a lot of people and do what they want. But is IS the real Islam? From the beginning the Islam is the religion of love. And a lot of Muslims are spreading love in a way we appreciate, but others might spread it on a way we don’t like that much. But it’s not the biggest part of the Muslims.

    And now I want to take a look at other religion. Are they better than the religion of Islam? I don’t think there is a good answer on this question, I can’t decide on what religion is good or not. People shouldn’t decide for others about what is good for them or not. It’s their choice, and they are free to make that choice. Who am I to say the Christianity or Islam or any other religion is bad, people have to follow their heart. I’m not on this earth to judge about someone’s religion.


    Freedom of everything

    So, in my opinion there should be freedom of everything. We all need to live together and should respect each other. It doesn’t matter if someone is black or white, Muslim or Christian, gay, bi or hetero. We should respect their choices and don’t judge. There is a big chance that your opinion is another one than the opinion of your neighbour, but does it really matter?



    A lot of question, with a small amount of answers. I keep thinking, every day again. Maybe you should think 2, about yourself, about others, about judging, about religion. And the best part is: It’s all your choice.


    Thanks for reading.