Hey guys and gals, not sure who remebers me lol. But yeah, as I stare down into the taskbar that tells me its just gone into thu, Id like to thank Dare for giving me the courage to finally post here. This is a tale that I hope explains my long absense for those who cares, some of my idiosycrantics, and maybe a bit more.
As some may or may not rember, i was one of the first members, and quite possibly my fav fact is that came with Qu!ck and Fred and was the only one who was not bannned, though i always privatly joked that i would eventually go too. And tbh I have. I enjoyed my time here, and have always loved everyone here, even the tards like Maj who threatend to dropkick Joe. But of course, life moves on , and so it was that by the time I got into my peak (sotospeak) here, I started uni, and I really could not afford to play this till the early hours of morning (much like i am now doing with black ops lol). Addiction is a funny thing, and I knew I had to go cold turkey or else. I manged it once when I quit the clan for the first time, and manged to struggle into uni. Then of course I cam back cos I missed everyone, but by that point, my heart wasent really in the game, though tbh ive always, always preffered the forums. Which is why, despite being one of the 'older' members , i never really got into the higher ranks. I didnt really know anyone , so I never really recruited, nor did i ever actually ban anyone. I was just happy minding over the forums
This then leads to my biggest regret here, which is that I never really got to know anyone. I made some friends yes, and I adore the crap out of the people i got to know like Baksa and Dare. But , as in life, I am quite the introvert, so though I had Xfire and Vent, I never used them. I know they say that the interent is an annoymous thing, but that only ever works if you remember that. Even though I know people dunno what I look like, who I love and what I hope, i can still get hurt when people pass hurtful comments. I have always, always wished that I gotten to know people better, but mmmm...life is full of regrets eh? I do wish that I had kept a treeline of past members. I remmber the last time i came here I was shocked by the number of people that had either been left or banned. The last time i was proper here, I was shocked by the number of new faces around, like Alex and Kristy .
But enough of that. What I am here, really,is to explain my long absence.
Firstly, the game . Its a mixture of two things really - the need to go cold trukey mixed with a lack of love for the game. As anyone can happily tell you , Vista is a bastard. And , though it worked at first, in the end, Vista and PB just compeltly fell apart. Sometimes I could get the game running, but it was usually five min before i gave up. In the end it was enough to do the trick of the cold turkey and just kill the affair complelty. So i gave up on the game
As for the forums, its again a mixture of two things - one, the lack of gameplaying , amking most of the forums that i would be interested in irrelevent to me and two, as with other forums i have used, such as Rue Morgue for example, I just got bored and moved on . Most likely this was preciptated by my lack of involvment in the game , but the end result is the same
I guess real life also didnt help much
And so what really I came to the conclusion was that i was no longer part of the clan. Sure, i still liked the people here, and hopefully they me , but I was just not part of the politics. So i knew I should have quit the clan, but i got too scared too of leaving , cos it would mean i was actually leaving what was no doubt one of my fav clubs of my life, and that i was proud ot serve, In the end the descion was made for me , but I still feel i should stick here that i am leaving, that i did enjoy my time here, that i am glad of the friends i made and that i may visit again in the future, but its unlikely to be frequent tbh
Take cares and so long all . Love you all to bits xxx
F257
No doubt still visible at
http://www.last.fm/user/F257
and
http://www.youtube.com/user/F257