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Posted

Love is just a chemical. We give it meaning by choice.

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Posted

Cats are kind of like girls. If they come and talk to you, it's great. But if you try to talk to them it doesn't always go so well.

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Posted

if you walk faster you will go alone; but if you walk you got farther accompanied

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Posted

water is poison. 100% of people who drink it, eventually die...

lol

here we have correlation vs causation :)

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Posted

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics. — Fletcher Knebel

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Posted

Men....

 

If you come upon an unknown dog, and it keeps looking you in the eye, walk away.

 

If you come upon an unknown woman, and she keeps looking you in the eye, walk away.

 

If you come upon an unknown man, and he keeps looking you in the eye, go for your pistol.

 

if you come upon an unknown cat, and it keeps looking you in the eye, get it off of your car.

 

if you come upon an unknown politician, and it keeps looking you in the eye, it's lying.

 

if you come upon an unknown person in the street, don't look 'em in the eye. Act like you got a phone call.

 

If you come upon someone, you know, in Walmart,  you are never going to explain why you are wearing high heels.

 

If you come upon your wife, when exiting a bar, just start crying, the pain is about to begin.

 

If you come upon a person carrying a sign, asking for money, check out their shoes.  The shoes give them away.

 

If you come upon a person in a wifi cafe playing COD4 or ET....sit down and talk to them.  They are probably an =F|A= member.

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Posted

Sleep is like sex. The longer you go without it, the nuttier you get.

 

True.  You can go forever without sex, but only 3 days without a BM. 

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