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How do you get over a girl? Venting


Jobba

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I've known a girl for a while (4 years, since 10th grade, we're both 19 now) and we're pretty honest with each other. She was really close to me, like a best friend. I like her a lot (like that), and she did too.

I didn't think it'd work out so I just didn't get into a relationship in the first place (I denied her twice). But now she's just drifting away and I find that I seem desperate when talking to her.

Like, I'd always be the one to send her a text, or check up on her every once in a while, but she'd rarely ever do the same. I don't want to be the desperate creepy guy, just friendly and appreciative.

I always give her the benefit of the doubt as to why she didn't respond to my texts in a short time, or want to talk in general.

Like maybe she's really busy, or not on her phone, or doesn't have service, whatever it is.

While i'm always quick to reply no matter what (Just who I am).

I'm starting to think that maybe I should just cut her off even though it seems like a **** move.

I'm thinking about just remaining friends, but not talking to her at all, which would be kind of hard for me since we always used to talk a lot.

I'm just feeling anxious about this whole thing

Maybe I'm just a newbie at this stuff and it might not even seem like a real problem

 

Otherwise, it feels nice to vent and I think I'm in a more solid place.

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well you denied her twice.... the best thing is that give her space... she might found a new bf or she is trying to have some space so she wont get more feeling for you and she afraid u shall reject her again.. if u really like her tell her and get over with it.. if she still likes u , u both will be happy and if not u both can be friends... its better to talk before its too late as she is your best friend.... 

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I've known a girl for a while (4 years, since 10th grade, we're both 19 now) and we're pretty honest with each other. She was really close to me, like a best friend. I like her a lot (like that), and she did too.

I didn't think it'd work out so I just didn't get into a relationship in the first place (I denied her twice). But now she's just drifting away and I find that I seem desperate when talking to her.

Like, I'd always be the one to send her a text, or check up on her every once in a while, but she'd rarely ever do the same. I don't want to be the desperate creepy guy, just friendly and appreciative.

I always give her the benefit of the doubt as to why she didn't respond to my texts in a short time, or want to talk in general.

Like maybe she's really busy, or not on her phone, or doesn't have service, whatever it is.

While i'm always quick to reply no matter what (Just who I am).

I'm starting to think that maybe I should just cut her off even though it seems like a **** move.

I'm thinking about just remaining friends, but not talking to her at all, which would be kind of hard for me since we always used to talk a lot.

I'm just feeling anxious about this whole thing

Maybe I'm just a newbie at this stuff and it might not even seem like a real problem

 

Otherwise, it feels nice to vent and I think I'm in a more solid place.

Well. I've never had a real relationship, but I know a few things. If you really still like her, just strait up tell her the truth. Tell her about why you denied her, and tell her that you like her and what not. Well that's really all I can come up with XD. But still, if you like her, just tell her the truth. 

 

Goodluck Soldier :)

-Sonofdoc

 

P.S: Keep me updated :)

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What Raevyn said: tell her. Second: like you describe it she might be feeling a bit "imprisoned". It's one of these f***ed op things with relationships; it almost always happens to one person at some point. The only way I see to fix this (and it takes a lot of time) is by engaging more challenges without her. It's.. The hardest part: try to look for new things, without really doing it for her. Do it for you and your own development. Do those things you've always wanted to do. Take that guitar class, take that extra job and use the money for your dream-trip,... Live. When you'd see her then, you'd have new and exciting things to talk about and to be passionate about and the tide might just turn. As a good side effect: if things would run bad, you would already have a few things on your mind so you can't get all too depressed.

You can talk all you want, but if you really feel like she's drifting away, you don't only need talk, you need change as well.

 

oh and

 

 

Oh, we're the worst audience you can get, I imagine.

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hmmmm..I would had said ..I like you a lot,I think we really too young to get into heavy relationship..I want to continue to be friends..want to have safe casual sex?

Just ignore Raskin, especially the last part :rolleyes:

 

If you have developed any romantic feelings toward that girl, tell her. One can't stop loving you just on a press of a button. So she still loves you, but being in your presence and talking to you reminds her of pain of rejection. Twice. And please, if you are not serious about your feelings, don't tell her anything, just move on. You must be sure what you want.

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...talk to her. honesty is always the best, although the reply may hurt. anyway after that both sites know whats up. better than guessing what could be the reason :) gl

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So many of you guys are having girl/relationship problems lately. 

They are both young, still learning it... if we can help in the process, we should.

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Jobba I know that it seems like the weight of the world is on your shoulders you feel you lost a friend and true friends are so rare, but really you did nothing wrong in denying any advance from her. If you want to retain this young lady as your friend open up to her and tell her how you feel, if I were you I would send her a letter by mail hand written. Don't send an email as it can be deleted in a second and a letter even if torn can be put back together and read. She may have been hurt when you rejected her ( how she sees it) but by now she is probably pissed. If you get no response from her start making 1 night a month for friends to go out. You must have some mutual friends that would like that as well as we grow away from each other so fast after graduation with college, jobs and families. 1 last thing my young brother at 19 I hope you are still in school or working in a career that you can make a good living as nothing can ruin a relationship faster than poverty.

Just my 2 cents.         

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