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Head above water.

- - - - - positivity depression optimism love happiness changes

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#1
MorriganAensland

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'Sup peeps !
 
Some of you probably haven't seen me in a while as a matter of fact, I post rarely on forums (You don't say ?) and I've been quite less active on Wolf ET. This topic will be somewhat the sequel of the one I've made in the past: http://fearless-assa.../?hl=depression So for those who don't know me at all (Shame on you, ya little fellas !), you'll get an idea of what I'm often facing with and who I am at the same time.
 
Ever since I've made the previous topic, I've made a few changes in my life. I got support of peeps on forums and in real life too. As a matter of fact, my life as known quite "The Swerve" (OMERGERD ! IT'S VINCE RUSSO !... Enough with the references nobody will get). So let's see how much things changed right after I wrote the previous thread.
 
Four days after I post it, the day before my birthday, I found love. A girl who seems so happy in the outside and super excited, somewhat childish at moments but a soul as depressed as I was in the inside. She was a friend of mine for like five years and we always were attracted to each others. Why did it took us that long before we really decided to date ? We're fools and we weren't sure if it would've worked. So we tried to give ourselves a chance... And we're happy. I don't think either of us have ever been that happy in the past.
 
[Not Important Piece Of Information]=> My girlfriend and I started as an open relationship, and she drove me nuts at some point. We were like "Let's be open minded and not call ourself officially as "couple" and let's just see if we'll find happiness that way. If you find someone and you're happier with said someone, so be it". After we cut this deal, there was my love life being complicated more than it should've because my girlfriend was one of my two biggest crushes probably in life. And then the other crush started flirting with me... And then three other girls said "I actually loved you, but I guess it's too late" and I was super confused about "What the hell is goin' on ?". My girlfriend often joked about harems and everything and she said she was open for a trio... But I declined any signs of temptation because I truely realized that I really love her. Like a super whole lot and I'm glad to be with her, I'm super happy. I've never been that happy in the past with someone.
 
Then I changed my routine. I used to go on other forums in wish I started to get a pretty bad rep' because people were jealous of me, so they tried to portray me as "The bad guy". I just straight up left that toxic virtual environement because I don't give a damn about them and I stopped giving a damn about their forums anyway for years.
 
I've started to eat better, getting slowly but surely back in shape, starting to get back some yoga poses, playing with the dog and the cat more often and all funny stuff. Getting friends to do stuff.
 
I've had trouble with the government accusing my family of fraud and giving us a fine of 32K $, but I'm somewhat over it. It will just take time to refund and on a more positive note: I'm now officially working at the video game store I used to help and where I've done some stages. My knowledge in gaming is an important asset to them.
 
So I'm having love, I'm working, I'm getting healthier and I'm more sane... But I never neglected the fun and side-projects too. I work on pretty much most of my free time on my Youtube channel in which I'm getting more and more proud as the further I progress. I may not and never get big, but I'm doing something with passion. And here's where a lot of the fun part kicks in: I've been doing some stuff with the first two Youtubers I follow since 2008 (That's already insane to me) and on the streams of one of them, one of his roomate, which is a nice fellow, added me in his contacts. Him, me and some other dudes have a nice weekly gaming session every Friday and we have quite a lot of fun.
 
If you count that, the fact I've opened myself even more to people since I nearly snapped, I evacuate the blues out of my body by playing violin. Ever since all these changes have been made, I never really felt the depression taking the best of me again.
 
We should remember that even in a cloudy day, the sun may take time, but it will surely show up.
 
Now I should head back to the game pretty soon, should I, mmm ?



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#2
audrey

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So happy you're doing so good Matt :)

#3
MorriganAensland

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So happy you're doing so good Matt :)

Thanks Audrey. I hope you're doing good as well. Lots of hugs and kisses !



#4
Koenios

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A nice read, I remember reading your previous topic, very nice to see it all turned around for you in a relative short time. :D



#5
Raskin

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Hey..wonderful news on coping with life hurdles...yeah...when you finally become exclusive with a lady,girls will fall over themselves to get with you..think its something to do with you being more attractive when you are with someone..funny that..which will ruin you current relasonship..then they bail..is strange..ET is good if not all consuming..a little cake is good..a whole cake and you get sick..ET really help me with my antisocial streak..glad to hear your are doing well

#6
Raskin

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As for me..woke 4am in pain..sleep hurts me sometimes and a weather front coming thru..i'm dealing with my hurdle as i do with a pill and wine..pretty much feeling giggly now. : }





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