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Storytime


mraw435

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lets share stories... i have a couple but they r so intense and amazing that i shall wait until i read some others

 

but ill give u a hint to my stories:

sexy but gay

cool but nerdy

amazing but boring

:geek::hmm

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Imagine This

 

Imagine there's no heaven.

 

It's easy if you try.

 

No hell below us.

 

Above us only sky.

 

Well, I'll tell you one thing.

 

If that happened I'd be really pissed off because I can't tell you how many hours I wasted going to mass and letting them put ashes on my forehead.

 

Plus there's all the hours I spent making up sins in the confessional and eating crappy pancakes made by the Knights of Columbus.

 

I can't get those hours back.

 

And another thing... if there wasn't a heaven or a hell, I'd probably start telling people what I really think of them.

 

I'd say, “You know what, Kevin? You're a dickhead. I don't think I want to work for you anymore. In fact, I think I'm gonna kill your family.â€

 

I wouldn't really kill his family, but I'd probably let him think that because it would be really funny.

 

And every few days I'd drive by his house, and I'd honk, and when his kids came outside, I'd make a slitting gesture with my finger across my throat.

 

Imagine that, Kevin.

(Written by paul stoecklein)

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Imagine This

 

Imagine there's no heaven.

 

It's easy if you try.

 

No hell below us.

 

Above us only sky.

 

Well, I'll tell you one thing.

 

If that happened I'd be really pissed off because I can't tell you how many hours I wasted going to mass and letting them put ashes on my forehead.

 

Plus there's all the hours I spent making up sins in the confessional and eating crappy pancakes made by the Knights of Columbus.

 

I can't get those hours back.

 

And another thing... if there wasn't a heaven or a hell, I'd probably start telling people what I really think of them.

 

I'd say, “You know what, Kevin? You're a ****. I don't think I want to work for you anymore. In fact, I think I'm gonna kill your family.â€

 

I wouldn't really kill his family, but I'd probably let him think that because it would be really funny.

 

And every few days I'd drive by his house, and I'd honk, and when his kids came outside, I'd make a slitting gesture with my finger across my throat.

 

Imagine that, Kevin.

(Written by paul stoecklein)

um.... what lol? :confused

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Jesus was just a regular person who died, and he did goods deeds so people put him in high respects ...but then crazy stuck up egotistical prudes started filling ppls head with bullshit which is what Christianity is today with all the overexagerated stories and the supernatural...

 

i apologize if this offends ppl lol, my opinion on Christianity

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Jesus was just a regular person who died, and he did goods deeds so people put him in high respects ...but then crazy stuck up egotistical prudes started filling ppls head with bullshit which is what Christianity is today with all the overexagerated stories and the supernatural...

 

i apologize if this offends ppl lol, my opinion on Christianity

 

Evangelical and Lutheran Christianity is a no bullshit and no stupid crap stories kind of Christianity. Catholics are the ones who make it stupid and overexaggerated. Seriously. Worshipping saints?? I thought the real deal is Jesus and God. Not the holy Virgin and whatnot.

like mraw, i apologize if this offends the cathlics. My opinion.

:D

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wtf, well my english isn't good, but read this:

running on a dark street with no one around me, just gave me more fear, a cold sweat while touring my forehead every time my breathing was more hasty despair my eyes and walked my legs trembling, my chasing a shadow figure, a figure that only in the shadows you could see hardly a malevolent face, a face of fear and terror thirsty while running wind stopped and it became dry, no time to noise, the light disappeared from my front to where I was a stench of death became more and getting stronger, my eyes are able to stop crying, my hands are both apretujaban himself that the nails were buried in my palms and blood came out, tears, fear, sweat of desperation and a cold wind that hugged me and suffocating

No can do, I can not continue, smelly and dark silhouette that has reached me chasing me, I have no other option, as I dropped on the floor, consider giving my last fight, I close my eyes in order to think about while I'm devoured by night, but, jajaja, (laughter and desperate without leaving my pace), I got it, I will, when my eyes are opened and a large white once I get up, I realize that can not be be as fast as he could see so much blood and not find my limbs has left me lying in a street under the lighthouse, with a yellow light on top of me, and a sad smile and crazy and let me control my tears ...

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Jesus was just a regular person who died, and he did goods deeds so people put him in high respects ...but then crazy stuck up egotistical prudes started filling ppls head with bullshit which is what Christianity is today with all the overexagerated stories and the supernatural...

 

i apologize if this offends ppl lol, my opinion on Christianity

 

Well, I guess you can't blame those crazy stuck up egotistical prudes for filling ppls heads, because they were hallucinating and waiting for their Messiah. 12 apostles speaking in tongues from eating mushrooms ftw!

 

Evangelical and Lutheran Christianity is a no bullshit and no stupid crap stories kind of Christianity. Catholics are the ones who make it stupid and overexaggerated. Seriously. Worshipping saints?? I thought the real deal is Jesus and God. Not the holy Virgin and whatnot.

like mraw, i apologize if this offends the cathlics. My opinion.

:D

 

You have a point about saints and virgin mary. It could also be said that reading the bible literally instead of contextually is dangerous and outright ludicrous. The bible itself as an authority especially when chapters of the new/old testament have been filtered as to what is Canon is censorship and control of religious literature itself.

 

So is the world under 6000 years old as the bible says? There are alot of religious FM stations that I listen to that denounce scientists and radio carbon dating conveniently citing this formula. "What if the scientists were wrong about the age of millions of years, and instead that was 10,000 years or less through the work of god." Also, dinosaur bones in the ground as a test from God? Ignorance is bliss I suppose when extremists must resort to nonsense math that would not impress a 10 year old.

 

To me, the bible is Aesop's Fables, with life lessons, however taking it literally instead of contextually would be foolish. Let's take the classic Adam and Eve story. God makes a woman out of one of Adam's ribs because Lilith rejected Adam as she did not want to be submissive.

 

Genesis 2:18 that "it is not good for man to be alone"

"After God created Adam, who was alone, He said, 'It is not good for man to be alone.' He then created a woman for Adam, from the earth, as He had created Adam himself, and called her Lilith. Adam and Lilith immediately began to fight. She said, 'I will not lie below,' and he said, 'I will not lie beneath you, but only on top. For you are fit only to be in the bottom position, while I am to be the superior one.' Lilith responded, 'We are equal to each other inasmuch as we were both created from the earth.' But they would not listen to one another. When Lilith saw this, she pronounced the Ineffable Name and flew away into the air."

 

So lesson learned?

Literal Interpretation: Adam wanted to pork Lilith, and she didn't want to be on the bottom but on top. Adam feeling sexual competition from Lilith insisted that he wanted to rock her world by topping her, while Lilith interjected as she wanted to be on top cowboy style to rock his world. After the two could not agree on a sexual position of equality, she swore to God "God damn him Lord, Adam is so stubborn,"and left him.

 

Contextual Interpretation: Adam and Lilith could not get along because both were equal creations from God with too many similarities such as pride and conscious of being equal creations from God. When God created Eve from Adam's rib, it could be viewed that since she was created from a part of Adam, that she had to submit by default to the dominance of Adam (Man), and hence they got along. In a nutshell, this story is meant to make women miserable and remind them of their 2nd class status to Men, which was popular at the time with the patriarchal leadership so that they could denounce the power of women who also were leaders of many female or matriarchal cults at the time.

 

It's all politics, even back then! Even that damn snake that supposedly tempted Eve to grab that apple was in reference to a popular female snake cult of Minoan civilization 1600BC - 300BC, which was just right next door to the Middle-East.

June_Superheroine_MinoanSnakeHandler.jpg

 

Sorry if I have offended anyone, just having some twisted fun. I have to hear alot of fanatics and extremists on the radio who are still living in the Dark Ages. So to each Cult for its Cultiness self! Cuz that's what all religions are to me, cults that have survived the time with a fellowship of naive followers to amass into a dominant culture.

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officially i am an orthodox. But despite i believe in god, I dont believe in church because church is business now.

 

dont wanna set up an entire view on this issue, since i am so confused about religion...

 

Church has been a political business since its conception. Control of the masses through mass, and conformity to religious worship of icons and deities. Remember the Papal States? It was a business and country run leadership of religion. Today however, wealthy religious lobbyists can affect any government by backing up leaders or political groups with money. It always has, and always will be this way. Why? Because they are greedy controlling humans who feel enlightened and must see their religious agendas carried to the furthest extent even in the modern world.

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officially i am an orthodox. But despite i believe in god, I dont believe in church because church is business now.

 

dont wanna set up an entire view on this issue, since i am so confused about religion...

 

Church has been a political business since its conception. Control of the masses through mass, and conformity to religious worship of icons and deities. Remember the Papal States? It was a business and country run leadership of religion. Today however, wealthy religious lobbyists can affect any government by backing up leaders or political groups with money. It always has, and always will be this way. Why? Because they are greedy controlling humans who feel enlightened and must see their religious agendas carried to the furthest extent even in the modern world.

nicely said man

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"And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter." - Revelation 8:11.

 

Do you know what "Wormwood" is in Russian?

 

Chernobyl.

 

makes you wonder...

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"And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter." - Revelation 8:11.

 

Do you know what "Wormwood" is in Russian?

 

Chernobyl.

 

makes you wonder...

 

actually it means black plant, dont believe in fairy tales :D

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hmm...

 

I just looked up Chernobyl in Wikipedia:

 

"The city is named after the Ukrainian word for mugwort (Artemisia vulgaris), which is "chornobyl". The word is a combination of chornyi (чорний, black) and byllia (биллÑ, grass blades or stalks), hence it literally means black grass or black stalks.

 

Sometimes chornobyl is erroneously translated as simply "wormwood" (which most commonly refers to Artemisia absinthium), with consequent apocalyptic associations, probably originating from a New York Times article by Serge Schmemann, Chernobyl Fallout: Apocalyptic Tale, July 25, 1986. The article quoted an unnamed "prominent Russian writer" as claiming the Ukrainian word for wormwood was chernobyl.

 

It fact, there are over 160 kinds of Artemisia, and the terminology is not generally accepted. Some sources refer to Artemisia vulgaris as "common wormwood", while others claim that "common wormwood" is Artemisia absinthium.

 

Wormwood is a different (but related) plant, Artemisia absinthium, Полин (Polyn). "Polyn" has no English equivalent, but corresponds to the botanical genus Artemisia. Botanically, mugwort is "Common Polyn" ; while wormwood is "Bitter Polyn" .

 

Still more confusion comes from the fact that the word "wormwood" is used in the English text of the Apocalypsis, whose usage as the name of a plant not necessarily matches to that of the orginal.

 

Chernobyl bears poetic connotations in folklore, for a number of reasons. Its strong smell is evocative of the steppe, as various species of Artemisia are widespread there. Chernobyl roots were used in folk medicine to heal neurotic conditions, although an overdose could lead to neurological disorders, including memory loss."

 

 

 

There you go. I suppose like most of the Bible it is open up to (gasp!!) personal interpretation.

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